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Politics

Politics

"I only meant to buy everyone a pint down the pub but I accidentally gave them all multi-million pound PPE contracts," admits Matt Hancock

Politics

Boris to personally shag every woman in UK as part of new Govt 'Project Love' to keep union together

Politics

Festering Flow of Government Corruption can now be seen from space, NASA confirms

Politics

Russia assures Ukraine that troops amassed at its borders merely got lost en route to Pizza Express Woking

Politics

Sea Life threatened by enormous oil slick after David Cameron goes for a swim

Politics

David Cameron to be told he made a right pig's ear of lobbying - but not in a sexy way

Politics

Boris to show the utmost respect by only dragging his hair halfway through a hedge backwards in honour of Prince Philip

Politics

Troubles in Northern Ireland absolutely nothing to do with colossal Brexit balls up, insists Govt

Politics

Under-30s to be offered alternative to Matt Hancock

Politics

UKIP's Peter Gammons admits he changed his name to appeal more directly to voter base

Politics

Public warned not to approach any crazed individuals armed with pints of milk

Politics

Scooby Doo gang reveal von der Leyen to be Nigel Farage

Politics

Immigration status to be decided by number of social media followers by 2025 under new Government plans

Politics

China to impose sanctions on nation of Iain Duncan Smith in retaliation for Uighurs assertions

Politics

New Government mandate to ensure each UK citizen wears at least three union flags at any one time

Politics

Mysterious camps set up on outskirts of Liverpool are for recreation not re-education, Government insists

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